Love and Be Loved

“We have this idea that love is supposed to last forever. But love isn't like that. It's a free-flowing energy that comes and goes when it pleases. Sometimes, it stays for life; other times it stays for a second, a day, a month or a year. So don't fear love when it comes simply because it makes you vulnerable. But don't be surprised when it leaves either. Just be glad you had the opportunity to experience it.” – Neil Strauss

I once believed love was supposed to last forever. It seemed simple: love and be loved.

Before, I viewed failed relationships as no more than wasted time. Weeks, months, or years of hard work invested into developing a relationship with a girl, only to see it all thrown away.

“Why couldn’t I maintain our relationship,” I would think. I wasn’t a douchebag. I wasn’t the type of guy only in a relationship for sex. I always gave my best effort to put my girlfriend’s interests first. Despite this, my relationships would always end unfavorably.

It was a few months ago, following a break-up, that I assumed our entire time spent together had been nothing more than a miserable experience. Why did I think these immensely negative thoughts? How could I have overlooked the good that came from our time spent together?

No matter the length of our relationship, the fact remained simple: during our time together, there were wonderful moments that made the relationship worth pursuing. Just because it didn’t work out in the end didn’t mean the relationship was a failure; it just meant that our relationship wasn’t meant to be forever. I’ve spent the past few years with several meaningful girls, each having helped me grow as a person. I don’t regret our time together or our breakup any longer. I regret thinking any of my previous ex’s could have been a mistake.

As the years pass by I’ll hopefully be able to find that special someone. For the moment, I am dating a wonderful girl named Lauren. I can’t imagine it not working out, but for now I have to realize how important it is to simply enjoy each day we have together, for however long that might be.